After reading my last post on the break-up of Mr& Mrs Pud then you will possibly understand that our world has turned upside down. As anyone who has no idea what to do in this kind of situation you turn to the internet for help (Not in the form of Tom Hardy quite yet! Haha) but what I did find is this list of tips about becoming a single parent on the Bounty UK website. What I thought might be a good booster is to see how I answer these now and in several weeks time…….
Top tips for coming out on top
As a single mum, taking complete responsibility can be a big challenge - from finding enough money and juggling work and childcare, to coping with emotional upheaval and the need to keep going for everyone’s sakes. Here are top tips for coming out smiling...
#1 - Take care of yourself
Work, homework, cooking dinner, packed lunches, washing, family admin – the list goes on and on. And when you’re doing it on your own, it can be pretty exhausting. So what you really need is ‘me time’. Look after yourself and it will be much easier to look after your children. Set aside some time for you every week, eat properly and get as much sleep as you can.
Yorkshire Pud – Hahahahahahahaha!!! Not eating properly at all but that’s down to a relationship breakdown and being pregnant I really need to so started eating fruit as it’s the only thing I can keep down.
#2 - Rock solid friendships
There are 1.9 million single parents in Britain, so there are plenty of people in the same boat. Seeking out single parents could introduce you to a big new group of supportive friends – look out for a local group or find single parents like you in the Bounty community.
Yorkshire Pud – Will be looking into this in the future but as far as my group of friends go I couldn’t have more support.
#3 - Get out there!
Lovely though children are, you need adult conversation and a break from ordinary home life. So why not invite friends round, join a club, do exercise or hit the town?
Yorkshire Pud – Ha not able to do much of this as yet as 33 weeks pregnant! But my friends are giving me great support.
#4 - Embrace help
If you’re offered help, grab it with both hands! Support from family and friends is important and can help you get back on track more quickly. A couple of hours childcare goes a long way – whether it’s freeing you up to get jobs done, or giving you space for a massage, exercise or even a date.
Yorkshire Pud – This is one I struggle with. I find it hard to pass George onto people as I feel it’s my job to look after him. However at the minute all the help I could get would be fantastic! I need to embrace help more which I imagine will come further on.
#5 - Enjoy the benefits!
As you adjust to single parenting – doing things your way, hogging the remote and enjoying a more peaceful family atmosphere, you may start discovering some upsides to your new situation.
Yorkshire Pud – Again I’m back at my mums and in one room so I think this will come as I find a place and start a fresh with my little ones.
#6 - Do it your way!
Taking responsibility means taking control and doing what is best for yourself and your children. It means you can set your own rules and work out what suits you best in the new set-up. And you can take command of the TV remote - whoop!
Yorkshire Pud – This will definitely be the start of a new me and new life.
#7 - New-found strength
You may find strengths you didn’t know you had, which will both help you face a different future, and lead you onto new, and more positive paths.
Your amazing children!
It’s natural to worry about how your children will react, but they may surprise you with their resilience and will quickly become used to it being just you at home.
Yorkshire Pud – My main focus is on getting a solid place for my son George to settle with him having a disability he’s very much in a routine and a true home bird. But as far a strength goes I’m a tough one and need to man up and move on.
#8 - Closer bond
You may develop an even closer bond with your children, particularly if you have a different view to your ex on what parenting means and you can finally express it.
Yorkshire Pud – Me and my ex partner had quite the same values but we will see.
#9 - And breathe out...
If family life has felt angry and tense, your home may well become a more fun place to live for everybody.
Yorkshire Pud – Definitely the house was very tense and just being away even though a huge piece has gone from my life I feel loads calmer.
#10 - Support
Gingerbread is a national charity that provides expert advice and practical support for single parents. Check out the website, free helpline and members’ forums, including great discounts and special offers.
Yorkshire Pud – Joined!