Totally fucked off....and that's ok? (5 Things for when you feel like your head is about to explode!)
Sometimes do you feel completely fucked off? Not sure why? Not sure how? But for some reason you just can't seem to shake the fucked offness?
I've had this loads and have been going through it over the last couple of weeks. To be fair there was nothing I really needed to be upset or angry about I just generally had the feeling of something is just not quite right. Last week I was quiet and for someone who is quite an extrovert I quickly became an introvert and decided to stay within the safe walls of my own home dwelling even more in my pit of fucked offery.
Are you like me and can sometimes be on cloud 9 and then drop to cloud minus 74 with an all mighty crash and find yourself like a smack rat looking for his or hers next fix in order to smile again? It wasn't until I hit my 30's and realised I do actually have some control over this annoying and somewhat frustrating flipitude of my life that I started trying to understand it.
I would say the majority of my sudden head issues are linked to my menstrual cycle this is an absolute definite! My body for some reason struggles with an influx of hormones, also the reason why I struggle taking the contraceptive pill as it turns me into the Hormonator! Yes I did write The Hormonater (Currently in a cinema near you!). Or it could be something as simple as the person at the fruit shop didn't smile at me how they normally do I must be a bad person, am I a bad person? The anxiety kicks in......I'm ugly, fat, gross and no one will ever want me! Haha! It's insane when I write this down.
1. Recognise it
......I'm totally fucked off right now. I know I'm fucked off because I feel like shit. Sometimes the biggest step of knowing your feeling shitty is to recognise it. Does it feel like I did last time? If it does what are the signs how can I recognise it again in the future? If you're a woman are you due on? If your not a journal or diary writer maybe its time you started and maybe you could try and pin point when shit starts going tits up?
2. Own it
.....Yep this is me! I am a person that gets fucked off from time to time and it is what it is. There's nothing wrong with saying this at all. In fact this is one of the hardest things to do! It's your business now one elses.
3. Understand it
.....What's triggered this feeling? Have I been drinking? Not eaten healthy or exercised? Do I have an unhealthy involvement with a toxic person? (More on this to come) Am I not where I want to be in life.......If you can understand it do something even if you feel like sitting on your arse. Do something!! If you have some mates that are close to you enough to talk to talk it out sometimes understanding something is hard to work out if you're in the middle of it!
4. Self Love
.......I am a guru at self love and I find this always gets me out of a shitty feeling. Self love don't mean sitting flicking your bean it means to truly give yourself some time and effort (See post here for what it actually is) Paint your nails, go for a walk, start a new project, have a fucking bath! Anything that's devoted to you and you alone. If it's hard cause your a mother like myself then leave the pots till tomorrow and have a face mask while watch Coronation Street! Or you could try my Self Love Bingo.
5. Move the fuck on
.....You know what I mean about this! Those people on facebook who constantly post shit about how wank they feel and never do anything about it! FUCK OFF! Recognise it, Own it, Understand it, Self Love and Move the fuck on.
This is totally what I do and I hope that it can help some of you in some way. If you are feeling incredibly down and see no way out please contact your doctor as changing the way you think might not be enough and you need a little bit more professional help.
Love yourself fuckers!!